NOTES FROM MY JOURNAL:
So, I made the mistake of waking up this morning and, instead of checking the weather like a normal adult who has to get dressed and someplace to be, I opened an Instagram reel a friend sent me at 2 a.m.
First mistake.
He’s in L.A. He apparently forgets that I am not. The reel was actually kind of funny, so naturally, I watched the next one.
Big mistake.
The next reel was a clip from a podcast featuring a very well-educated, very articulate man explaining, in great detail, why civilization may be on the brink of collapse.
Nice! And good morning to you, too.
Nothing like a little existential dread before coffee.
And, unfortunately, I had already been thinking about and questioning civilization the day before.
I was on the train when a group of young people boarded. And when I say young people, I mean teens. They were loud. Obnoxious. Vaping. Screaming. Shouting obscenities. Carrying on as though the train was their personal living room and the rest of us were merely inconvenienced spectators.
My first thought was:
*We are so f#ked.
Because if these animals are the future, civilization is definitely ending.
And let me clarify before someone comes for me: I use the word “animals” only to describe their behavior…not them as human beings. Animals probably behave better and some actually have home training!
I sat there thinking, What happened to basic consideration?
You know… the concept that other people exist?
That perhaps screaming across a train car, blasting profanity, vaping in an enclosed space and generally behaving like you were raised by wolves isn’t exactly the gold standard for participating in society????
And then, less than 24 hours later, Instagram served me a highly educated man explaining why civilization might actually be in trouble.
Now, I’m not going to pretend I can explain the decline, or potential collapse of civilization before 9 a.m. I’m also not going to pretend I understood every point this guy was making because, frankly, my brain was still negotiating with my alarm clock and what the hell I’m going to wear to the “office.” Yes. After 40 years, I’m back to dress code.
But it was a terrifying interview. And, of course, it ended with the obligatory hope cliffhanger. Comment something to get the full interview. (Nope! I’ve seen enough. Thanks!)
Because apparently, even when civilization is collapsing, we have to leave room for a hopeful ending.
So here I am, drinking coffee and wondering:
What the hell is going on?
And then I had another thought.
If the world really is on the brink of disaster…
I am clearly not having enough fun.
Because my next thought was:
If civilization is ending, why exactly am I getting dressed for work?
Why am I putting on work clothes and not flip flops?
If the apocalypse is imminent, shouldn’t I be at the beach? With a cocktail with a little umbrella in it? Or at least somewhere with a view?
Honestly, I have asked myself some variation of that question almost every day. And maybe that’s the part that got me thinking.
Whether or not civilization is actually ending, and I sincerely hope it isn’t, we are living in a time when there is an enormous amount of uncertainty, anger, division, bad news and anxiety being delivered every few seconds.
I can’t help but think about young people. It must be terrifying to be young right now.
Imagine being 18, 20 or 25 and constantly being told that the planet is in crisis, the economy is broken, the future is uncertain, technology is going to replace you, social media is destroying your attention span, artificial intelligence is coming for your job, and civilization itself may be heading toward some kind of catastrophic reckoning.
Then add the pressure to look perfect, be successful, have a career, have a relationship, buy a house, be financially secure and somehow maintain your mental health while an algorithm continually reminds you that everyone else appears to be doing better than you.
No wonder so many young people are anxious.
And maybe some of the behavior I witnessed on that train wasn’t simply a lack of manners. (Although that was definitely a huge part!)
Maybe some of it is a symptom of a generation that has been handed an enormous amount of uncertainty and very little instruction on what to do with it. That’s not an excuse for being obnoxious on public transportation.
I’m still going to need you to lower your voice.
And put the damn vape away.
But it does make me wonder. We older folks love to talk about kids today.
They have no respect. They have no attention span. They don’t know how to communicate. They don’t know how to work. They don’t know how to behave.
And often, honestly, we have a point. MANY DON’T!
But perhaps we also need to ask ourselves what kind of world we have created for them.
Because they didn’t invent all of this. We did.
We created the technology. (Well not my generation, but the one that followed!)
We created the 24-hour news cycle.
We created a culture where being outraged gets more attention than being thoughtful.
We gave them smartphones before they had the emotional maturity to understand what those smartphones could do to their brains.
And now we’re shocked that they’re anxious, distracted and overwhelmed?
Maybe we should look in the mirror occasionally.
Of course, none of this answers the original question:
What’s going on?
I have no idea.
And after that Instagram reel, I’m not sure I want to know.
But I do know this, if the world isn’t ending, I need to stop behaving like I have unlimited time. Whether the world is ending or not, I definitely need to stop behaving like I have unlimited time.
The answer seems to be the same no matter what question I ask myself of late.
Go have some fun.
And maybe, every once in a while, instead of opening Instagram at 7:30 in the morning, check the weather.
What’s going on today?
Hell, if I know.
But I need to try to have a little more fun while I wait to find out.